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What is the point of seeking a Soulmate when they do not come first?

Our matchmaker and date coach Shannon helps with advice to singles dating to actually find a soulmate, and often finds many singles do not quite know what this involves!  Dating online may be fun, and how seriously though are single men and women when seeking a soulmate? With all the hard work we all do to meet our yearning and needs, and when love does find us (or at least is a great sign it is happening and there is a strong spark) why do we not succeed at keeping that blossoming love interest?

 

The advice hereunder from a leading guru on successful dating is food for thought!!  We can add that many, many times a new love interest often fizzles because one of the parties in the new love relationship does not feel they actually come “first” ………we all have and love our significant relationships too and until the ‘new partner” they came first, understandably. Where does the ‘newcomer’ fit in?

 

Dating Successfully means also being a keeper

 

Our children should come first, it is normal, then parents, family friends, colleagues, and even pets …….however, if a new soulmate does not become our FIRST priority, not just fall in line behind the rest, then they may not stay. A new soulmate has to stand beside us, united in our goals and dreams and ideals, as we become “us and we” (no longer you and me) and as a united front, be the role models and evidence that strong relationships will stand the ups and downs of life.

 

Single parents need a dating strategy when seeking new love

 

It is a sensitive matter, especially for single parents when they start dating again, often punching in the dark on dating sites. “Divorced children” are not to blame for parents splitting up, and need to understand that mom or dad needs a new “friend” too, and preparing them for this, will make it easier for everyone to adapt, respect and start building a new family unit. When Little Johnny or Little Sally grow up, they will perpetuate the lessons they learn from parents!  What lessons did we then learn from our parents? Even when very young, children should learn to respect others. A new partner can then invest their all in supporting a healthy set up!!

 

When there are red flags our date coach can help.

 

Eytan our date coach has much to share on the matter, because we often hear a new relationship is taking strain when the children rule and dominate and the “newcomer” has to live with a spoiled child/children who have no social boundaries or quite honestly, out of control in worst case scenarios – and as per experts, by 5 a child should know the basics of right and wrong! If you care to discuss, please email him on Eytan@perfectpartners.org.za and he will book your free session once you are a member!! www.fromdivorcedtodating.com.

We also know that “guilt” plays a role as single parents often over-compensate and spoil their darlings way beyond the norm!! Children then learn to manipulate ……..and as adults, we have all suffered at the hands of “manipulators” ….nip it in the bud!! Prepare your closest family to accept your new dating adventure and understand your need for a soulmate too!

Happy couples raise happy children!!  Happy children grow up to be respectable members of society – and happy adults!!  We must think of the seeds we sow before it is too late!! We want more than anything for all our members, especially parents, to be VERY happy when dating new love prospects!! Maybe more members would also be open to meeting others with children if they knew they walking into a healthy set-up!! FACT!!

We would love to hear from you today, let us discuss your own dating by design strategy and start by saving you all the anxiety on where and how to find love again! Please submit your personal profile and let’s talk!!

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