fbpx

Matchmaker & Date Coaches Gives advice

As leading matchmakers and date coaches we hear continually from new enquiries that they are just battling to find their “type” and 99% of dates are “wrong” when trying dating apps. We also hear every day from members still seeking, when offered a new introduction,  “sorry and no thanks, not my type” which actually means “no physical attraction” and no inspiration to actually meet a potential other who is, in fact, a great prospect. Most humans have a “type” based purely on the visual, and it is our perspectives as a dating agency with nearly 20 years’ experience, it then is no wonder they are the “wrong type” when the mists of passion clears!!

Do we Fall in Love with our Eyes First?

Yes, humans are influenced instantly by visuals/images of someone first. According to all the gurus in the dating/relating/mating game, this often stems from old imprinting. It may NOT be that they are looking for the next Ms. World or Mr. Universe, but that they feel more comfortable with what is familiar to them. And yes, it could be their idol on TV or a movie star or a poster boy or girl they never met!! It is often fantasy or even worse, a delusional obsession!

Science has proved that we actually, at a deep and cellular level, are attracted to what we are used to, ever since when our eyes first opened – but consumerism and avatars, movies, porn and all the stuff on “beautiful people” play a huge role too!!  Commercialism!! Are we reducing love to a commercial pact? Commercialism rules the ideals of love?

Why Exlporing the Singles World is Key?

It explains why Singles of all ages send us “my kind of guy/gal” pics which 95% of the time are movie stars or celebs!! When last did they have a real relationship with a “10/10” from the Beautiful People world? In the end, we usually attract a mirror image of ourselves, the experts say! It also depends on age and experience. Does this not demonstrate that the average single person has not had much exposure to real dating or had a choice of others to explore, thereby expanding their framework of reference? No harm in doing something differently to get different results!! Your matchmaker is here to guide!

Our Date Coach Helps Find “My Type”

We examine the reality of having a “type” and not looking further than the mind’s eye. Hence, we encourage everyone to meet everyone within reason and explore and expand your framework of reference BEFORE settling for the first option!! You may be nuts over Ben Aflek but have you ever met a Sheldon or a Michael Jordan? What is your assessment tool? Maybe it is worth checking to see what is out there!! My best friend never dreamt of eating oysters until they tried one ..and now it is a favourite!!  This is not the series “Marriage at First Sight” so no harm is looking around!!

Testimony of a Happy Single Dating with my Agency

We received a most encouraging affirmation from a member who signed up at the beginning of 2002, after being on dating apps and so-called matching online sites with nothing but frustration. Susan says “The best move I have made was to join the Perfect Partner’s singles’ community and have my matchmaker doing the recruiting and verifying for me. Personal introductions were steady and manageable, and I started meeting lovely bachelors.  My evenings were no longer consumed with getting to know new matches and idle moments were spent reading a few pages of a book rather than mindlessly swiping. Behind the scenes, something else was happening to my mind. Because I was no longer analysing photos to figure out if I was attracted to someone, physical appearance lost a lot of its significance. Subconsciously, I’d stopped focusing on someone’s looks when determining whether we had a spark. And then dating took on a new meaning for me as I started using my heart intelligence to guide me rather just my eyes”.

The Basic Rules to the Dating Game

Sure, you get people, and more people and then some!!! And yes, some repel us at the sight and others we feel we have known forever!! When we stop looking at only the “image”, we start to see the awesomeness (or sadly, the ugliness?) within, and apply those standards we KNOW to spell success!! Google the THREE DATE RULE (or the FIVE DATE RULE) and see why it is important to get to know someone you actually feel good around!! You may be pleasantly surprised! Love may just find you – but first – meet the RIGHT others!!

Apply today and we will contact you for an orientation chat and also build your very own dating by design strategy!!

The Perfect Partners Team

Read Next Blog, Red Flags in Terms of dating